I don’t care where I was. Class project, kegger, birthday party. I needed to be with the cool kids. That’s where it was at. No one else was good enough, and it was a waste of time if I had to spend my time with not-as-cool kids.
I still feel the temptation now, as a working college grad.
I was at a party the other night. Just some friends hanging out, drinking/talking/whatever. And somehow, I found myself away from the “life of the party” people. The people everyone wants to be around, the people that make your night perfect and radiate coolness and generate interest fast than a money market account.
Oh crap, what do I do? Why am I wasting my time over here making stupid small talk with these rando’s when I could edge my way over the the hippest corner of the party? Thereby becoming hip myself?? Hurry hurry hurry!!
Obviously, I’m a paragon of depth and genuine character. Not superficial, no sir-ee-bob.
Well, I was acting stupidly. And so do you.
We all do in those moments. At hangouts, dinners, parties, kickbacks – we all want to be with the cool kids. We don’t want to miss out. In fact, there’s a phobia called FOMO that’s all about the fear of missing out.
Stop being shallow, and stop trying to inch your way over to the cool kids while you’re slyly half-listening to the boring stories told by the boring people at the party. Instead, MAKE THE DAMN PARTY COME TO YOU.
Become the cool kid. Completely immerse yourself and become ENTIRELY present, wherever you are. Don’t wish you were somewhere else with someone else. Instead, take a genuine interest in the people right in front of you. Don’t take the easy way out and nod your head while fidgeting for any possible escape route – ask questions, laugh a lot, make jokes.
Make the party come to you.